Weird day.
Still confused when I open my eyes in the morning.
I don't know what I'll see.
Still surprised to see my bedroom, and not the big window of my hotel room.
I've been back a week, but I'm still totally lost.
I don't suppose it helps that I still just leave BBC on all the time.
Maybe that was the source of the issue all along. Ha.
Man I was happy to see Lindsay's face today. That little cherub smile just totally relaxed me. It told me someone was gonna have my back all day and that the ass wouldn't be able to touch me.
Although I feel kinda bad.
I think I got him in trouble.
Didn't mean to.
Even if he did bring it on himself.
Damn, I've really missed the ice here.
Eating in Atlanta was so strange.
Much happier on my ice diet ha ha.
I still miss Persephone. I still feel like a part of me is gone.
Sometimes I lay in the bed and imagine her laying next to my head like she would do. That helps a little.
I love working at this mall.
It's so pretty.
I never thought I would ever find any part of Vegas pretty.
But all the trees and shops- they just did a great job.
Ha ha my tattoo still looks like I got in a fight with a wood burning tool.
I may very well have to fix that one...
Such concern in people's voices when they comment on my burn....
Chris Isaak is playing on the mall soundtrack.
I kinda miss him.
He actually makes me think of summer in a positive way.
I should try to go see him again.
***********
Sooooooooooo much better. Eliminating that one element from my day completely made it better. So there's the trick. Just ignore his rude ass.
It went so much more smoothly today. I begin to feel as though I will get this. And now that I really know I have so much more support than not, I actually found myself enjoying things again. I <3 my team. And the ass brought whatever crap storm he lands in on himself.
My first week down and nothing broken. Nothing ruined. No awful customer situations.
Weird shit going on around me. You think I don't see it, but I do. I always do. I'm an observer. That's why I'm so good at talking and saying absolutely nothing. Because I'm actually observing.
It's so funny- I am so helpfully warned to stay away from so many people. Sometimes by the people I've been warned away from. I should probably pay more attention to all of it. Give it more weight. But I can't. I know she's going to burn me again, but I adore her, so what can I do? It's that kind of thing. I just have to be who I am. Besides, it's not like my heart can truly get any more shattered. So I figure I'm good. ;)
I want to dye my hair. But I don't think it can take it. I may chance it anyway. We'll see. It's amazing how much better I feel on my ice diet ha ha. More alive even. Makes absolutely no sense.
Again I have to thank DomDom. So helpful. Just exactly what I need.
So stabbing yourself in the eye with a plastic fork, not such a good idea. Just throwing that out there.
I love my little Fraggles, and I'm off to spend some time with them.
<3
"Always acknowledge a fault. This will throw those in authority off their guard and give you an opportunity to commit more." - Mark Twain
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